This…this panda is so happy at the prospect of being a dog’s busy buddy / mouth friend.
That face. That reality-piercing gaze. It’s hypnotic. It’s terrifying. It’s sheer, unrestrained joy contorted into a caricature of soulless delight in its own impending destruction.
Don’t you dare try to tell me that’s its nose.
Don’t you dare.
Bene scribete.
Is this a style of shorts now? With danglies hanging off the bottom?
Is it–is it so you can strap in your legs?
In case you’re really bad at wearing pants?
Bene vīvite.
D D D D D X
Bene vīvite.
I feel like you shouldn’t put dingo meat in the middle of dog treats, let alone 25% more of it. Not even mini dingoes.
I feel like that’s basically cannibalism.
I feel like you shouldn’t make your dog a cannibal.
I feel like that’s inconsiderate.
Bene edite.
Why have I got the dizzies. I wish not for them. A week is far too much dizzies.
Frowny face.
Bene vīvite.
No.
Wrong.
These are Costco cookies, of all things.
This isn’t the right thing that happens.
I’m not having any of these.
Bene edite.
Get some lump.
Not just some pedestrian, you know, street lump, but some premium lump.
It’s wild caught lump. You can tell because if it weren’t wild, it wouldn’t need to be caught.
Get some lump and keep it refrigerated.
♫ It’s lump, it’s lump, it’s lump, it might be crab. ♫
Premium lump, everyone.
Premium
I don’t want it at all.
Bene edite.
I’ve written before on blast-writing exercises and zero-drafting, so my interest was certainly piqued when I heard of an application designed to viciously facilitate that process.
The idea behind Flowstate is simple. You pick the length of time you wish to write for, then start hammering away on those keys. If at any point you stop typing for more than five consecutive seconds before that time is up, everything you’ve written is erased.
How’s that for motivation?
The downside is that it is currently only available on Apple ecosystems. The downier side is that the Macintosh version is $15 and the iOS one is $10, which in the mobile market is a pretty steep ask for such a rudimentary program.
I’ll keep an eye on it, though, and probably snag it for the iPad when it comes down in price. Sounds like just the sort of thing to keep the don’t-stop discipline in check and help curb those pre-editing tendencies.
How about you? If you find yourself struggling to get those initial words out, would you consider trying a run-or-die method like this?
Bene scribete.
What have you been doing?
Have you been drinking waiting room coffee out of a room-temperature cup like some sort of–some sort of deranged psychopath?
Warm your paper cups, everyone, so they can be warm. Warm them. Warm them on clearance for only one-hundred and fifty of the dollars, which is an even better deal than warming your cups for $300.
Make your paper cups warm even before you pour scalding bean juice into them and they get so hot you have to use a cardboard sleeve to comfortably hold them.
What are you doing?
Warm your cups.
Bene vīvite.
Planet Earth is blue, indeed, to have lost both the King of Space and the Voice of God in the same manner, at the same age, in the same awful, awful week.
Farewell to the Pharaoh of Freaks, the Sultan of Strange, the Wizard of Weird. Goodbye to the Sheriff of Nottingham, the Raider of Nakatomi, the Master of Potions. May your contributions to the world continue to entertain and inspire.
Under the serious moonlight.
Always.
Bene vīvite.
Writin' Fish 