Just another normal day, shopping for Normal Things at Rosauers.
Oh, nothing to see here. Just a perfectly normal box of penne and ch–
…what in the unholy $%&# is chreese!?
I feel like whoever titled this product’s mouth melted in the midst of saying it, and no one bothered to question it. I mean, surely, they thought, surely, an actual human being, living here in this reality, speaking this very language, meant make the sound “chreese” on purpose.
Crunchy, creamy, hue of wood.
Salty, spready, really good.
Mash those peanuts to a paste.
Smear it on – enjoy the taste!
Peanut butter is really good. Not exactly really good for you, though.
So you’ll find certain brands sold with certain key factors reduced or removed to mitigate the guilt – sodium free, sugar free, even fat free.
Until a couple days ago, however, I would not have expected to encounter an utterly, indigestibly calorie free peanut butter.
*Contains Trace Calories
There’s something mildly creepy about the notion of eating something as rich as peanut butter (or an approximation thereof) that’s so dietarily insubstantial that your body doesn’t derive any energy from it. I mean, it’s technically not even food at that point. (>^-‘)>